For Parents & Students

For the Student

1. I'm really homesick.
2. Sometimes I'm really afraid to take risks.
3. I'm learning about self-discovery, but sometimes I'm not sure who I really am.
4. This is different than living at home. There I had lots of friends and family to talk to.
5. I really miss my friends from high school. I e-mailed my best friend from high school a week ago and I still haven't heard back from her. I wonder if our friendship is going to last.
6. My classes take up a lot of time! My first test is coming up in a week.
7. I'm sure going through money fast. I never realized it took so much money just to live!
8. I really like the food here. I think I liked it too much because I've gained ten pounds!

For the Parents

1. It's really quiet and lonely at home without my child.
2. The whole dynamic of our family has changed. The other children are different without their sibling around.
3. College expenses are more than I anticipated!
4. When my child is unsure of the new environment, I don't know what to say.

Commuter Issues

1. Students who commute from home do not face the challenge of living in a totally new environment. They are, however, presented with their own set of adjustment issues.
2. Many students try to keep their hometown relationships with high school friends intact. At times, this may interfere with their transition to college.
3. Some students may resist making friends for fear of betraying old ones.
4. How they respond and connect to their campus during the first month can set the framework for their entire collegiate career.

Checklist: Managing Emotions

• Give yourself a pat on the back for getting through September! Surviving the first month is a milestone!
• Accept ambivalent feelings. It's OK to feel torn between excitement and sadness.
• Don't overreact to problems. If your student detects panic in your voice, it may heighten his of her emotional response.

October and November Issues

For the Student

1. I'd like to plan a weekend to go home.
2. My long-distance relationships are starting to fade.
3. Mid-semester exams are coming up soon. I'm worried about them.
4. Sometimes it's difficult to balance academics and extracurricular activities.
5. I wonder if my money is going to stretch far enough.
6. I wish I could go home in time to help prepare for Thanksgiving.
7. Family weekend is coming up. I'm a little nervous about my parents visiting.

For the Parents

1. My child is coming home for the first visit! I want everything to be right.
2. Family weekend is coming up. I'm a little nervous about being on campus.
3. Our family dynamics are different.
4. I'm worried that my student is not studying enough for mid-term exams.
5. Thanksgiving will seem different this year. How can I make it memorable?

Commuter Issues

1. Commuters often find that they have to make an extra effort to become involved in campus activities. The effort will pay off in the long erm!
2. Commuting students can use large blocks for free time during the day to connect with a campus activity. Commuters should seek out student information centers, such as bulletin boards, campus websites, and the student newspaper to stay informed of campus activities.

Checklist: Recommending Campus Resources

• In early October, remind your student about campus support systems such as academic advising and the student counselor center.
• Refer to orientation materials and literature to refresh your memory about the campus resources that are available.
• Encourage your student to take advantage of resources on time management.
• Give responsibility to your child for making the initial contact with a specific campus resource.
• Remember campus resources are for both residential students and commuters.
• Communicate your support! Discuss the advantage of using campus resources that enhance your student's college experience.
• Encourage, rather than demand!